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06 December 2012

The Battle of Unrealistic Expectations


It is Thursday and this is the most prepared I've been for a show in ages, probably ever. This is my 14th year of Christmas holiday shows; some I was just a vendor, many I organised and ran. This one I am just selling my own wares. Of course I had unreasonable expectations about what I could accomplish for this show; given that it was the only one I am doing this season. Given these unrealistic expectations, I am still okay with not crossing every item off my ridiculous list.

Today I finally finished one of the set of 7 corsets that will comprise the first line of corsets that I have been working on for a year and a half. This one was cut out a year ago, and I have been trying to work on it and her sisters in between other obligations that I have been desperately trying (or avoiding) to end their obligation that hangs over me like a dark cloud. It has been such a slow process that I have wondered if I could ever finish just one. And today I did. The others will follow sooner or later; they are all in various stages of started but not done. I need to remember that I chose corsetry because it is intricate, has a lot of steps and pieces, and is difficult and complicated. They are like paintings. I can tweak and fuss over them, but I need to be careful not to overwork them. Knowing when something is finished is an art unto itself.

I keep telling myself that this will be my last craft show. I don't know if this is really true, I say it every year. My business is evolving in this slow change that I have no idea where it will end up. I know I am not quitting. These things I have started will be finished in their own time, and me trying to push it won't make it happen any faster. When I started with the corsets, I wanted to make museum pieces. They are slow and fussy, and require thousands of tiny stitches.

So if you are around Portland this weekend, come see me at Crafty Wonderland. I will be there with all my finished pretty things.

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